The “What the HELL were you Thinking?” Department, installment 1

August 29, 2005 at 12:54 pm (Soaping and Knitting, WTF)

In the interests of learning from my mistakes, I'm going to be editing old posts here and there, with this being the first. Those of you who ship things for a living can also please make notes on how NOT to ship shit.

From December 2004

Un-fucking-believable!

The winner for the Worst Packing Job this holiday Season Award is in my hands, right now. And it couldn't have happened to a worse package.

I'm a soapmaker. Also an incense maker, occasionally a candlemaker, and generally if it reeketh, I maketh. Since I can't get reasonably priced fragrances and essential oils (the tools of my addiction–I mean hobby) locally without promising my firstborn (whom I'm very fond of), I mail, eBay and otherwise cause to have sent to me these fine drugs–I mean scents. Most of my suppliers pack very, very well. But today's proud winner does not have the sense Dog gave an ant.

I just opened a Priority Mail Flat Rate envelope that has so much Mulberry fragrance oil (FO) leaking from it that the entire house reeks, as does yarn I have ordered, the rest of the mail, the mailbox, my comforter, my hands, and now my poor Beagle, who just begged for petting from Mama and I couldn't say no to those limpid brown eyes.

There was a 1/8" bubble wrap envelope expected to hold 18 oz of FO–three plastic bottles not-sealed with packing tape (SOP whenever liquid is shipped), and the envelope itself. WHO on God's green earth expects such flimsy packing material not only to absorb the FO in case of failure of seal or in the event of squeezing by machine? I have to add that the USPS also requires absorbent packing, which wasn't present.

Maybe it's just me, but I assume a gorilla wearing a red, white and blue nametag reading "Masher" is gonna single out my little package and jump his silly ass all over it, and I pack for same–heavy tape on all liquids, absorbent packing, bubble wrap and peanuts (ask Jav–he buys my goodies). And liquid NEVER goes in those niftoid Flat Rate envelopes, no matter how much the person getting the stuff wants it to, since the USPS employs mail-sorting machinery with "Masher" in the manufacturer's title. I'm certain of it now, since it do look like something mashed this envelope I'm telling John, my faithful fiance, to remove from the house NOW NOW NOW.

~Sighs~ Argh.

I can offer you a great deal on Mulberry FO right now–but no Flat Rate Envelope ship please.

***In fairness, I have to say that the supplier did re-send the shipment, in a real live box, with craploads of padding, about two weeks after the original shipment came in. While it was far too late to do anything with it then, I did appreciate his making amends.

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