How does he keep forgetting?

March 23, 2006 at 11:46 am (Daily Dookie)

I hate being sick. Yeah, I’m sick. Again. Again with a respiratory thingy.

When I’m sick I have two options for places to go–the computer room, where I desperately need a new chair because the one I have has been abused for almost 8 years now, or the upstairs bedroom, where I don’t have computer access and when I’m between Netflix fixes there’s just what DVDs I have on hand and TV to watch.

Last night was option #2–I’d been sitting here and couldn’t take it much longer, so I repaired to the relative peace of my bedroom, where a fight that had been brewing with Honey took place, then more peace and quiet. So, I’m sitting there, watching Kiddie Hour finally end on American Idol (Bye, Kevin, it’s about fucking time you went home), when the little pile of trash needing to go out (happening today, since Trash Day is tomorrow) started rattling.

Shit. I know this far from the more populous areas you get an occasional mousie, but they don’t usually venture to bedrooms when there’s no food for them. What else would that…

RATTLERATTLERATTLE

What in the FUCK is making ALL that noise? That’s too much for one little stoopid mouse.

Thumpsmack…as I try to make a scary noise to make the scary noise go away.

RATTLERATTLErustlerustle…what the fuck is that…grey…mouse-shaped…

THUMP!

RATTTTTLLLLLLEEEE…little grey…

“Desi Dog Damnit! GET THE HELL OUT FROM BEHIND THE BED!”

I damned near burst into tears of relief as the little mouse-shaped thingy (that I totally missed the claws on) morphed into a grey fuzzy kitty, complete with laid-back ears and dirty, put-upon look. Honey chose that moment to burst into the room, yelling, “What…where…I’ll save you…”

“What’s wrong?”

“Your cat is a stupid fucking mouse-ignoring piece of shit, Honey. She just scared the shit outta me.”

“She’s your cat and…”

“No, Honey, YOU picked her out, remember?”

Stoopid fucking cat. Wonder if she wants some catnip?

What? She was annoying but entertaining, so she ought to get a reward.

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